Sunday, February 10, 2013

A Mistake (23)

I know that I'm not a good blogger and it takes me forever to post but things keep coming up that distract me from the blog. madree itha  layl7en feee nas tgra my blog, bas this to all of you waiting enjoy ;*

لا تعشمني بَ حبك ثم تروح يا تجيني عمر ولا لا تجي.. ما ٱخاف أعيش من بعدك جروح بس ٱخاف أحب غيرك ثم تجي

As I mentioned before things with 3azeez kept getting worse over time and I kept hanging on to him. He was the first guy that I fall in love with. I was so attached to him that the thought of losing him just breaks my heart! He used to be so good to me and I don't really know what happened? Is it possible that he replaced me with someone else? A girl that would keep her man satisfied and happy. I was never going to give him more than what he got because I'm better than this! t3arfooon laama 6ol 3omrkom masken roo7kom min inkom t7iboon witkalmoom o lama tyeen t7beenlich wa7id '6ameerich dayman iy2anbich and your pride keeps you from doing many things that other girls are willing to do?

That was how i felt back then I was hopeless I couldn't do anything about it because I cant mention this to anyone or Id be dead by now! I was young, stupid, and confused. I had no one to guide me and tell me that what I was doing is just meaningless. Iwanted to take and a risk and confront him about the way I felt which to be honest is miserable, I was sad and depressed most of the time unlike other girls who were insanely happy and madly inlove.

outgoing call: A
it kept ringing and ringing and he didn't pick up, typical

my phone buzzed indicating that I have received an sms
from: A
wya ilrb3 shfech

Awal matf'6a call me

I waited till midnight, he hasn't called so I drifted to sleep, at around 4am my phone was vibrating nonstop I knew that someone was calling so I instantly pressed on the green button

me: alo (I was so tired my voice could be barely heard)
Aziz: asif 7ayaty ga3adtich
that was it! hearing his voice got me stuttering it was so deep and sexy I missed it
أبسط أسباب السّعاده صوت من تحب
me: umm la 3adii bs mnsd7a ta3bt
Aziz: shfech oboii intay shile mt3bch laykon ana? tara ayech 6ayer il7en
me: aziiiiz 3an ilshi6ana!
Aziz: intay ilee m5ch ray7 feha wila ana bare2 maglt shay
me: hehehehe inzain ya obo ilbara2a inta
Aziz: magiltele shfech 7abebte 5ar3tene 3lych
me: ahhhh la 7abebe mafene shay bas walaht 3alayk
Stupid! I was so Stupid! I gave up so easily
Aziz: ma7ad galch sotch shay ma9ar wntay tawch g3da mn ilnom
and off he went with the flirting and the sweet talk. He was so good at making me forget. a7la wagt wiya lma kint aklma 3l phone 7ta law mara bil sna bs hal mara t3aw'6ne 3an ilayam ile ra7aw kilaha iy7asisne chna mako bl dnya '3air 3thob o chne a7la ma bil kown o ine amlik ildnya kilaha, bas min a9akr mna il5a6 I start crying so hard I feel bad for myself mahma iysawe arja3 a7iba min yid o ydeed ma9art ya 3aziz wala ma9arat!

Aziz decided to travel with his friends to London during the summer break and I was done with Highschool going on to Uni, I didn't travel that summer because of the things that I had to do with registering and taking placement tests and all.

Aziz talked me into getting bbm back so I did in order for us to improve our relationship he told me that through bbm we could talk to each other 24/7 rather than signing in and out from msn.

At the beginning we were so good we would tallk to each other the whole day like old days, then slowly Aziz started to back off, I might send him a text and he'd reply after 4 or 5 hours not even minutes. It was crazy but I got the hang of it.

It was time for Aziz to leave

3ithoob: Azeez

after and hour,

Aziz: hala?

3ithoob: 7i6 balk 3la nafsk o please 6amne 3laik awl mato9l dont get me worried

Aziz: inshala lat7aten wntay b3d 76y balch 3la 3mrch

3ithoob: inshalla, bil salama inshala
            I love you

Aziz: alla ysalmch

and he ignored the I love you part

هل هو جنون عندما.. اهتم ﻟامرك وانا لا اعرف ماذا ،اعني لك”

I thought to myself that he might me busy with all the packing because he's heading to the airport in an hour.

Aziz: yala 7ytaty ana bil 6yara bye

3ithoob: allla ma3ak bye 7abebe

and off he went he sent me a whatsapp once he arrived to the hotel and that was it 3 weeks have passed without a single phone call or a text asking me if I was doing ok.

His birthday was coming up and I knew that he'd still be in London lets hope I can reach him soon

فمان الله ياقلب خلقه الله عديم احساس.. تعبت اغليه واحبه لكن ماحس فيني


Anonymous said...

LOVEEEE LOVEEEE LOVEEEE!!!! Tawa I'm a new reader I just started reading ur blog ams oo within 2days I read the whole blog!!! Wallllaaa jadd sa7arteeenii ib ur blog it's like amazingggg!!! Please post soon;******!!<<3333 really loveing the blog and most importantly LOVING U!!

Red said...

thaaankk youu it meaans alot! Im so flattered walla, o inshalla i'll post tonight :D
love you tooo ♡